You've Got Questions? I've Got Answers.

I recently read an article answering random questions about the olympics. I thought to myself, "Self, the readers of your blog deserve to have these mysteries and others solved for them." This is why I have done some extensive research (in this case meaning I made a few clicks on Google and Yahoo!) and have found some answers to your burning olympic questions.

Why do the divers shower between dives?
Now, I'm pretty sure they don't let young children, who rarely have time for pesky little inconveniences such as bathroom breaks, swim in the pool, so that eliminates my first thought as to why someone would head straight to the shower. It turns out it is to keep their muscles warm since there is such a large temperature difference in and outside of the pool.

How old are the Chinese gymnasts.. really?
Well, there seems to have been a miscommunication between the International Olympic Committee and the Chinese Olympic Committee. The IOC stated that the gymnasts must be 16 to compete. The COC, however understood it as saying that the combined ages must be 16, thereby clearing Team China by a good three years. I'm still waiting to confirm this with a reliable source...

What is that black thing on beach volleyball player, Kerri Walsh's, arm?
I know you've heard the rumors that band aids are breaking into the fashion accessory scene, but this one's legit. Walsh had shoulder surgery, so this is kinesio tape that is supposed to help with circulation and shoulder alignment.

Did the men's archery gold really go to someone who is blind?
He actually has 20/200 vision, so, yes, he is legally blind. Don't ask me how that works people, I just report on these things.

Does Michael Phelps fall asleep with the TV on or off?
He likes to fall asleep with the TV on. Ha ha! Who am I trying to kid? Michael Phelps doesn't sleep! He's too busy swimming, winning gold medals, leaping buildings in a single bound, and defending small villages around Beijing to sleep.

What will be the name for the U.S. b-ball team at the 2012 olympics?

We've had the Dream Team I through IV, the Dirty Dozen and now the Redeem Team. So, what is my prediction for the Team U.S.A. Basketball in four years? The Tostitos, Toyota, Vitamin Water, Nike Team brought to you by Redbull.

~D~

Oh, gravity? ...that's just a minor obstacle.

Let me start off by saying that if I could do a back flip I would be proud. Add it on to a balance beam and I'd be stinkin' proud. Add to both of those a crowd watching my every move, I'd amaze myself... but still be no where near the Olympic gymnasts I just watched. Basically these girls break every law of gravity, thermodynamics and some small countries during their routines. I watch in amazement as the announcers comment on their mistakes which mean nothing to me unless they fall off the apparatus, which if done stylishly, would probably mean just as little. Basically what I'm trying to say is that these girls are incredible. That's why I have created a new rule; you can only criticize the U.S. women for taking second if you can do a back flip on a balance beam in front of a screaming crowd. Now, I know this may eliminate criticism but not disappointment because those girls have focused their whole life on this moment. However, to China's credit they really did an amazing job, by this I mean they seem to have fallen off something a few less times than the Americans. They also seem to have sacrificed more. According to the announcers, most of those girls are recruited around the age of three (which, judging by their looks, would have been sometime last year) and are actually taken to where they will train except for a visit home once or twice a year. Did I mention they do this at the age of three??? If that's what they have to go through to get gold, I'd be begging for the silver medal. Although I don't think I would have had to worry that much... I never was very good at back flips...

If it's all about image, what is "Highest-ranking imperial concubine's milk bread" doing for ya?

By now most of you have probably heard about the Milli Vanilli scandal at the opening ceremonies. The little girl who sang whenTeam China entered was determined not cute enough. So, in "national interest" (apparently determined by the National Department of Cuteness) and at the last minute (the Minister of Cuteness had until then been focused on a massive Hello Kitty seige) the girls were swapped... but not the voices. So, at a ceremony that celebrates the many talents of the world, this little girl was told you are talented, but what's really important is that you are cute... and you are not cute. For what it's worth, I think they're both adorable, but then again, what do I know, I'm not the Minister of Cuteness.

Oh, but at least this doesn't happen with the athletes. There must be some other factor that explains why I see action shots of guys playing beach volleyball in shorts and shirts, but switch over to the women and they are standing around in little bikinis. Apparently, this is because the women don't actually have faces, thus the only differtiating factor the public has is their butt. This is why we must not be distracted by excess clothing and the butt must be visible, if not central, in every shot. This is extremely hard to do when they are actually playing great volleyball, so they must do it while they are calling plays or getting pictures taken with the president. But, to give credit where credit is due, so far the U.S. women's butt's are kicking everybody else's.

Well, we've learned that image is apparently a national matter in China... and maybe some other places... so, what is the average Olympic tourist seeing on the streets of Beijing? For this I turn to a great source of what's really happening in Beijing, field reporter, Dave Barry. According to Barry's blog the people of China have been nothing but helpful, kind and welcoming. The food on the other hand... let's just say I'm not sure what Highest-ranking imperial concubine's milk bread is doing for the whole image thing.
-D-

Lookout Bob Costas!

OK, I warned you, I'm an Olympic junkie. I just have to let you all get excited with me!

If you haven't watched the 4X100 freestyle men's relay, you must do it now! Just so you know, Team France has been talking some serious smack about beating the U.S. in this event, so it's even more rivoting. Now, go watch it... seriously... go...

D

I'm Seeing Stars

OK, I admit it. I'm an Olympic junkie. But, seriously, it's like one amazing human interest story after another and the fact that all the different nations are together... well, I'll stop before I start gushing. So far I have only seen the opening ceremonies - which were quite amazing although slightly militaristic at times - but I have already picked out some stars.

Lopez Lamong

Even though this distance runner was not born a U.S. citizen, he was the best choice to be the flag bearer for Team USA. The most important run of Lamong's life was years ago when he ran from militia who forced young boys to become soldiers. He spent years in a refugee camp before he was adopted by an American family. Now he runs for the U.S., but also as a way to get the word out about the troubles in Sudan. Definately check out his story and his campaign for Team Darfur.

Lin Hao
This little nine year old came in alongside the knee of China's NBA star, Yao Ming. Although dwarfed by the basketball player's size, there was no way the camera could move off the excited smile that survived the epicenter of the Sichuan earthquake. After the quake Lin went back to help other students get free and encouraged them while rescuers pulled them from the rubble. 20 out of his 30 classmates didn't make it. Are you crying yet? His little three foot frame and miniature flag certainly stole the show.

D